Thank you

All my life, I've received a lot of help from the people around me, especially my friends. And most of the time, I had failed to remember their kind gestures or even who they are. It's not because I didn't appreciate what they do, rather I forgot to show my appreciation, if appreciation to them means to constantly call or text or go hang out together at the mall. It's not because I didn't care but rather, I forgot to care

because my family's like this and my parents are like this and we are living like this

and I'm coping with everything and my head hurts a lot and my heart hurts a lot.

Maybe they (my friends) resent me for being so detached but they must know, not everyone is living a perfect life like they do. What you see on the surface doesn't always reflect what's on the inside. You may hate me for always going up to you to ask for more help but you must know I hate it that I have to live like this.

And to have someone to lean on to once in a while after being pressed down hard for several weeks and months is such a relief that I can't put into words.

My "thank you" may sound like just another "thank you" you get from a cashier in the supermarket but believe me, if I can illustrate it, it would be as vast as the sky.

I don't care if you hate me because I am always thankful to have a friend like you. 

And I may forget but God doesn't.